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(1965). The Divided Self.
"The component we wish to separate off for the moment is the initial compliance with the other person's intentions or expectations for one's self, or what are felt to be the other person's intentions or expectations. This usually amounts to an excess of being 'good', never doing anything other than what one is told, never being 'a trouble', never asserting or even betraying any counter-will of one's own. Being good is not, however, done out of any positive desire on the individual's part to do the things that are said by others to be good, but is a negative conformity to a standard that is the other's standard and not one's own, and is prompted by the dread of what might happen if one were to be oneself in actuality. [emphasis mine] This compliance is partly, therefore, a betrayal of one's own true possibilities, but is also a technique of concealing and preserving one's own true possibilities, which, however, risk never becoming translated into actualities if they are entirely concentrated in an inner self for whom all things are possible in imagination but nothing is possible in fact."
(1956). The Organization Man.
"We practice a great mutual deception. Everyone knows that they themselves are different—that they are shy in company, perhaps, or dislike many things most people seem to like—but they are not sure that other people are different too. Like the norms of personality testing, they see about them the sum of efforts of people like themselves to seem as normal as others and possibly a little more so. It is hard enough to learn to live with our inadequacies, and we need not make ourselves more miserable by a spurious ideal of middle-class adjustment. Adjustment to what? Nobody really knows—and the tragedy is that they don't realize that the so-confident-seeming other people don't know either."
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false_self
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http://purl.org/vocabularies/princeton/wn30/synset-pretense-noun-1.rdf
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linked content:
- sense: feigning
- sense: pretence
- sense: pretending
- sense: pretense
- sense: simulation pretense
- in scheme: http://purl.org/vocabularies/princeton/wn30/
- gloss: the act of giving a false appearance; "his conformity was only pretending"
- hyponym of: http://purl.org/vocabularies/princeton/wn30/synset-deception-noun-2
- synset id: 100754956
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