| Title | From Conflict to Resolution: Strategies for Diagnosis and Treatment of Distressed Individuals, Couples, and Families |
| Publication Type | Book |
| Pub Year | 1990 |
| Authors | Heitler, S. M. |
| Publisher | W. W. Norton & Company |
| Keywords | accountability, antipathy, conflict, cooperation, depression, helplessness, submissiveness |
| Notes |
conflict"The more an individual has been exposed to no-win situations, the more readily he assumes that other situations cannot be changed for the better. As a consequence, such individuals put out less effort to try to control new conflictual situations." (p. 89) depression"Reactive depressions typically occur in response to a dominant-submissive settlement to a specific conflict." (p. 76) submissiveness"Similarly, the term 'submissive' is not meant to imply any particular tone or style of yielding or surrender, but simply that the concerns of that side do not become incorporated into the solution-building database. In depressogenic interactions, responsivity to the concerns of the submissive side is minimal, with those concerns relegated to second-class status. If the concerns on this side are of only minimal importance, they may be given up in a willingly compliant manner without engendering depressed feelings. When the issue is more critical, giving up may incur more sense of loss, suppressed anger, hopelessness, and helplessness. Still, the style and tone of submission can vary widely, engendering reactions varying from a brief sigh to prolonged despair." (p. 75) antipathy, cooperation"Battling people generally go to war because they think that the opponent is a villain, and that they, on the side of virtue, have been victimized. A reframe which enables people to see that they and their opponents are both simultaneously hurting and being hurt by each other, reciprocally interacting in a negative spiral with one another, may soften the antagonism. As the antagonism decreases, the virulent view of the other typically mellows as well. A view which affixes blame for the problem at least in part on some external cause (instead of on each other) can further enable both sides to relax their guard and begin to cooperate. This external cause can be a situation or life circumstance." (p. 277) |
| URL | http://books.google.com/books?id=4MhBz1QK_NwC |
